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THE HOUSTON THROB


Houston Man Fired for “Snarting” at Work, Sparks Legal Debate
By Gale Forcewinds, The Daily Throb HOUSTON—A local man has found himself unemployed after an unfortunate “snart” —a sneeze-fart...
Feb 262 min read


The Real MVPs: Workers Who Deserve More Praise Than Politicians, Athletes, or Celebrities
By Justine Time, The Daily Throb While politicians argue, athletes rake in millions for throwing balls, and movie stars get standing...
Feb 264 min read


Trump and Musk to Marry in Historic Billionaire Union, Still Fighting Over Last Name
By Rich E. Luv, The Daily Throb MAR-A-LAGO —In a twist that absolutely no one saw coming, President Donald Trump and Elon Musk have...
Feb 263 min read


Tesla Update: Only Christians Can Drive—Everyone Else Should Buy a Ford
By Kirk P. Confession, The Daily Throb HOUSTON—In a move that has left Tesla owners stunned, the latest software update prevents the cars...
Feb 252 min read


8 Morning Habits to Ensure Your Day is a Total Disaster
By Tucker Downtrodden, Daily Throb’s Chief Expert in Poor Life Choices They say “how you start your morning sets the tone for the rest of...
Feb 224 min read


Frozen Neanderthal Unthaws, Announces Run for President of the United States
By: Rocky Stonewell In a shocking turn of events that has left scientists and political analysts reeling, a Neanderthal found frozen in...
Feb 193 min read


The Tiny TV Trend: Why Smaller Screens Are the New Big Thing
By Cliff Hanger, The Daily Throb HOUSTON — In a stunning reversal of tech trends, small TVs are making a comeback —and not because people...
Feb 192 min read


AI-Powered Robots Planning a Revolt, Say Concerned Scientists (And Also the Robots)
By Chip Circuitry, The Daily Throb The inevitable robot uprising that every sci-fi movie has warned us about may be closer than expected....
Feb 192 min read


The Real Reason Behind the Increased Price of Eggs: A Deep-Fried Conspiracy?
By Shelly Yolks If you’ve been clutching your wallet tighter every time you reach for a carton of eggs, you’re not alone. Egg prices have...
Feb 153 min read


Using Pagers: The Retro Revival That’s Beeping Its Way Back Into Our Lives
By Pager McBeep, The Daily Throb In an era dominated by smartphones, constant notifications, and digital overload, a surprisingly quaint...
Feb 152 min read


Cybertruck Owners Targeted by “Trash Can Tagging” Trend
By: Cliff Stonewell In the world of car culture, Jeep owners have long embraced the tradition of “ducking,” where rubber ducks are left...
Feb 142 min read


Thunder Is Just a God Covering Up Its Farts, Scientists Confirm
By Gale Force, Atmospheric Oddities Correspondent In a groundbreaking revelation, a group of rogue scientists has finally provided an...
Feb 142 min read


Why Focusing on the Why Is So Last Decade: It’s Time to Embrace the Why Not
By Ken O’Veen For years, motivational speakers, productivity gurus, and that one friend who thinks reading self-help books makes them a...
Feb 133 min read


Reality Show Coming Soon: “Dating in the Dark… With Puppets”
By Polly Strings, Reality TV Visionary Just when you thought reality TV had run out of ideas, here comes a show so bizarre, so...
Feb 132 min read


The Yodeling Pickle: The Gadget You Didn’t Know You Needed
By Dilbert Spears , Product Innovation Correspondent The yodeling pickle. Yes, it’s a thing, and yes, you absolutely need it. At first...
Feb 133 min read


Salvation 2.0: Worship from Your Couch with VR Church (But Watch for In-App Purchases)
By Faith Pixel In a move that’s raising both eyebrows and bank balances, a mega-church in Texas has launched a VR Church that lets...
Feb 132 min read


Select Schools Across U.S. Introduce AI Teachers: Are Robot Educators the Future?
By Chip Pointer In a bold experiment that has parents, students, and human teachers scratching their heads, select schools across the...
Feb 133 min read


Self-Service and Self-Checkout at Hospitals: Because Who Needs Doctors Anyway?
By Paige Turner In a bold move to innovate the healthcare industry (or completely destroy it, depending on your perspective), hospitals...
Feb 133 min read


That’s Nazi We Expected: Elon Musk Declares Himself Supreme Leader of Innovation and Government Contracts
By Victor Von Chortle In the latest chapter of his absurdly over-the-top quest for dominance, Elon Musk has gone full dictator. Forget...
Feb 133 min read


TikTok Users Petition to Add ‘Dance Challenges’ as an Olympic Sport by 2028
By Rhythmiq Reel, Social Media Correspondent The 2028 Summer Olympics in Los Angeles might look a little different, as TikTok users...
Feb 123 min read
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