Whistleblower Reveals Big Oil Companies Betting on Next Spill—And Maybe Causing Them
- Slick Gamble
- Jan 29
- 1 min read
By Slick Gamble
A shocking new report reveals that major oil companies aren’t just making money off oil—they’re allegedly making side bets on who will cause the next major spill.
According to an anonymous whistleblower known only as “Deep Crude,” executives from competing oil giants have turned environmental disasters into a high-stakes betting game. “They’ve got entire spreadsheets ranking past spills, tracking cleanup costs, and even giving out ‘Most Creative Leak’ awards,” Deep Crude revealed.
The real scandal? Some insiders believe companies may be sabotaging each other to win. “One week, Exxon is leading, then suddenly, bam—a mysterious pipeline failure at BP,” said an industry source. “Coincidence? I don’t think so.”
Big Oil has, of course, denied these claims. “The idea that we’d engage in anything as reckless as gambling on environmental disasters is absurd,” said one spokesperson while wiping oil off his hands. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to check my fantasy spill league rankings.”
As investigations begin, one thing is certain—when it comes to oil, some companies just love to play dirty.
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